Conscientious and Compassionate Kids

My kids are always ready to give me a helping hand, especially in the dark. (Though they do need firmness when it comes to household chores, but that's a different story.)

If I am in an unfamiliar, darkened area, one of them will grab my hand and lead me a designated spot (chair, bathroom, car, etc.).

It's like they are on autopilot. It's second nature to them. They know Mom doesn't see that well in the dark. If there's a lamp that offers some visibiity, I will only see what's right in front of me.
It will be similar to this:

Everything else around me will be non-existent. I won't see it.

In familiar surroundings, I know where everything is. The brain has this great capacity to fill in the blanks so that you think you see more than you really do. I could move my eyes across the room and I would know where everything is. I might not see it, but I know it's there. All I have to do is dart my eyes back to that spot. That picture will still be there. My bottle of water will still be to the right of me. The person I am talking to will still be there (unless, of course, he/she moves away and I find out I am talking to air). The snapshot in my mind will give me, for lack of a better phrase, a false sense of security about my surroundings.

The girls are really good about it. They both understand it, yet I feel like I am making them grow up too fast.

With hearing loss, I guess I have many ways to make up it, such as watching facial expressions and body language. I don't always pick up on tones of voices, but the facial expression will make up for that-to a point. I have had hearing loss all my life. It's always been a part of me. I am used to the frustrations of not "getting" everything. This, I could live with.

My youngest will, as kids do, try to find a way to use it to her advantage. If I say "no" to something, she'll ask me again, over and over. Some kids may do this to wear down the parent. Some parents may break down and say, "Okay, fine." But, I take it in a different context. To me, it's like she's repeating it because she doesn't think I heard her right. "Mom, I said...." This is supposed to make it "okay." Is that going to get the"yes" answer she seeks? Nice try.

It's taking me a long time to accept visual impairment. I always look back to the days when my vision was better. When I was a child, my siblings and I, and the few kids we had in the neighborhood would play Hide and Seek. Or we would go swimming after dark or walk around the quiet country roads in the dark. I was able to see stars in the night sky. I remember hunting for nightcrawlers at night after a rain.

I was able to read for long periods of time without missing a line.

I dabbled in tennis, I enjoyed it. Now I would not play tennis. I can't keep my eye on the ball. It disappears from my line of vision and I can't find it.

Parenting is hard work. With a dual sensory disorder, I always hope that my kids will not take advantage of that. "Mom won't hear it or see it." They have on occasion tried to get away with things, but then again, what kid doesn't? There are times when I do not see or hear what they are doing, but again, what kid doesn't try?

I hope that they will have enough conscience to know what's right and what's wrong.

I know that my kids will be more sensitive and compassionate towards others who are "different."

And that's okay with me. :)